The Strong Woman Image in Kerala: What It Costs Women’s Mental Health
In Kerala, the image of the strong woman commands deep respect. Many families see her as the backbone of the household, and the state’s literacy achievements and matrilineal traditions in some communities reinforce that view. People praise her resilience and intellect. Above all, she embodies sahanam, a capacity for endurance and grace under pressure.
But this celebrated strength can hide a harder truth. The strong woman image in Kerala often silences real emotional pain. For women struggling with anxiety, depression, or burnout, speaking up can feel like betraying generations of quiet endurance.
The Hidden Toll of the Strong Woman Ideal
An ideal that rests on endurance leaves little room for admitting struggle. As a result, asking for help can feel like failing at the very thing that earns a woman admiration.
Researchers have described this pattern elsewhere. Cheryl Woods-Giscombé developed the Superwoman Schema through research with African American women, and it names five internalised expectations: showing strength, suppressing emotions, resisting vulnerability, succeeding despite limited resources, and helping others first. A 2024 research brief from the University of Texas at Austin found a link between worse mental health and the combination of these expectations with high financial strain.
That research comes from a different context. Still, the pattern it describes will sound familiar to many women in Kerala.
How Suppressed Emotion Shows Up
When families and communities discourage emotional expression, distress rarely disappears. Instead, it often changes form. For example, some women notice fatigue, headaches, or digestive problems with no clear medical cause. Others notice isolation, irritability, or a constant, quiet anxiety.
Consider a composite example that describes no real client. A woman in her late thirties, a successful professional and mother, appears unshaken to everyone around her. Privately, she battles intense anxiety and a fear of failing. Because strength and visible vulnerability rarely seem to go together in her world, she has never said so aloud.
What the Data Says About Women and Mental Health in Kerala
This is not a rare experience. India’s National Mental Health Survey (2015-16) found that overall mental disorders were more common in men. However, depression and several anxiety related disorders were more common in women. The same survey also found large treatment gaps across most disorders.
In Kerala specifically, a published analysis of the survey estimated current mental morbidity at 11.36%, with neurotic and stress related disorders at 5.43% and depressive disorders at 2.49%. The authors noted that common mental illnesses were high compared with national estimates.
Many people still see seeking help as a sign of weakness. As a result, many women skip counselling even when support is available.
Healing Starts With a Safe Place to Say “I’m Not Okay”
Counselling gives women a space to express real feelings without judgment. In sessions, women can break the cycle of silence, name what is actually happening, and build ways to manage anxiety, low mood, and burnout. For many, the first relief comes simply from being heard without having to perform strength.
Reimagining Strength
The future of Kerala’s strong woman lies in more than endurance. It includes the courage to say, “I am not okay.”
Redefining strength starts at home. Families can validate a woman’s struggles and respond with empathy instead of dismissal. Likewise, communities and media can share stories of healing and support. Slowly, that changes what strength can look like.
Support for Women in Trivandrum
The legacy of the Kerala woman is powerful, and it should never imprison her emotional truth. As a licensed psychologist in Trivandrum, Rajula Maniyeri supports women dealing with anxiety, depression, and stress, including new mothers facing postpartum depression. In addition, Rajula offers sessions in person and through online therapy. Book a session to begin.
This article is for general awareness and is not a substitute for professional clinical advice. If you are struggling with your mental health, please consult a licensed mental health professional.